Feelings
an excerpt from a reflective report assignment with some minor add ons
Starting my own blog or publication is something that I’ve always wanted to do but lacks the incentive and motivation to do so till the opportunity presented itself to me.
As someone who is interested in creative writing, there is a few reasons why I wanted to have my own publication. For years since I started writing, I always preferred writing physically over digitally and there are a few reasons why I preferred it that way even till today as technology advances and for the sake of improving myself and my writing pieces I slowly adapted myself into writing digitally.
When I put some thought into it, I am terrified of having my own works published online. I am afraid of the criticism and judgement from readers even though I am aware that the only way that I can improve is through criticism and judgment.
I am a writer or at least I consider myself to be even though there is a large part of me that feels like I am still not qualified to be one with all my flaws. When I write something no matter it is a chapter for a storyline or a summary for a screenplay, I want to be free and only limited by my imagination and creativity. I hate being restricted by rules and guidelines while writing which is funny considering that I am a Mass Communications student which meant that I must involve myself in journalistic writing which to my knowledge is to write under a set of rules and guidelines so the news piece would be easy to understand and does not look out of place.
Despite that there are no regrets within it that I decided to pursue Mass Communications all those years ago. Because I feel that it’s a combination of what I went through in my diploma and degree that gave me the courage to publish my own writings online and got me to where I am today.
The sleepless nights spent grinding assignments day before submission. The sense of dread that followed by sense of achievement when everything finished. The sense of comradely knowing that I am not going through this alone. Course-mates turned friends turned family.
God I find it funny how I miss those times even though it felt like living hell back then. Certainly something that can reminisced about in the future like now.
